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Registered: 4 years, 4 months ago

Since beginning my life journey --at a slow and easy pace-- as an Ordained Friar of The Church of the Latter-Day Dude, I've, like, felt something inside my brain that seemed to want to seek out further avenues in my fleeting existence from which to find a nice bench to sit upon, and contemplate non-contemplation on a much deeper, and absurdist, cosmic level.  Once I was sure that the thing in my brain that inspired this wasn't a tumor, or some particularly rude Kush, but a subjectively genuine quest to find an objectively apocryphal degree in higher learning while concurrently being high.  And after a bad burrito, which forced me to face mortality in unimaginably unsanitary public restrooms, and one oddly clean Jack-in-the-Box dumpster, the impetus was two-fold, and starkly clear: 1.) Get a degree that not everyone can get (if they don't know the web address) and; B.) Hope that dubiously calling myself "Doctor" with a dubious PhD, which, while decidedly not being a Doctor with an MD (nor even an authentic PhD Doctor) *could* cause me to mystically & instantly know useful Western medical rituals to use in potentially saving the lives of humans who tragically eat at the same burrito place from which that awful feeling, motivation, as well as gastric distress, which was the gateway un-drug that led me to quasi-matriculate at Abide University & Institute's satellite campus, which is now the official name I have for my basement, to end my sick compulsion to earn the privilege to not earn a PhD from a privileged University & Institution, like yours, which without any research on my part, was obviously the only sensible option for the piece of this Universe referred to as "Me." Or, as I am an optimist, soon to be known as "Dr. Me, PhD" or probably my legal name instead of "me"...while keeping the "Dr." and "PhD" parts, which are what matter more than my name, actual credentials, level of formal education, results of urinalysis drug screenings, or being a rodeo clown that one night in Amarillo.

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